Campus talk

So our school has this new paper, that comes out every month. ITs usually really funny, and is the most read piece of paper on campus. THis month's edition was definately one of the best I've ever read. ITs sooo fuckin hilarious, the first 30 pages at least. Anyways, u know how newspapers have like social commentator/advice columns, well, this paper has a couple, and theres this guy, Frank the Cab driver., gives you the most frank advice ever. Its so mean and so funny . Heres an excerp from one of them.
 
I have been dating a women for over 2 years. A while back, she saw me follow her in my car. I had followed her because of my own insecurities and lack of trust. She was very upset and accused me of "Stalking". I didnt make too much of it and told her it wouldnt happen again.
 
Recently I felt as though I needed to see where she was going. She caught me again! This time she totally flipped.
 
I am not the "creepy stalker" type! I just wanted peace of mind by knowing what she was doing. She said she did not want to be in an unhealthy relationship and broke up with me.
 
I cant believe she ended such a great relationship because of these 2 minor incidents! Our relationship was flawless besides these 2 occurances! AM I out of line?
 
-addicted to love
 
What the hell is the matter with you? Are you out of line? Geez dude, your whacked! I mean , you are out there. Somewhere down the road, you must have gotten bitch slapped, because you gone loco ese. Call me nuts, but I think most women would absolutely flip out if they found their boyfriend following them around in their car. "Where are you going, honey? what are you doing? Why are you doing that?You are seeing whom? I would kill you if you cheated on me. Hee hee, just kidding sweetie, love of my life Hee, he hee". This is beginning to creep me out.
 
The fact that after the first time, "YOU DIDN'T THINK ANYTHING OF IT," is pretty wierd. But even after she told you not to do it, you still felt an incredible urge to get in your car and follow her around AGAIN! You are confused as to why she broke up with you only after 2 MINOR INCIDENTS. You dont trust her so much, that you actually took the time to travel after her because "I JUST WANTED A PEACE OF MIND." All of these words in caps are a sure sign you are a huge whack-job. You are a creepy stalker with serious insecurities and until you fix them, you should stay away from women and automobiles.
 
 
 
IF YOU GUYS WANT THIS PAPER, i'LL BE MAILING TING I BELIEVE LAST MONTHS AND THIS MONTHS, SO U CAN GRAB SOME FROM HER IN SAY ABOUT 3 WEEKS.
 
WAR
 
-DAS